Last night I had two bad dreams that were almost exactly the same but a little different. They were both about me going into labor WAAYYYY too early/or miscarrying. Literally I looked down at my stomach and thought, I can't have this baby yet, it is definitely not big enough or developed enough to make it outside of the womb.
It was terrifying obviously. I think this fear has always been in the back of my mind, but it hasn't had the opportunity to surface yet. Sickness with nausea and vomiting have calmed down a bit and it has given me more time to think and process the past couple months and some of my fears and things I'm looking forward to. Sometimes I think I get too excited, then other times I am not excited enough.
Pregnancy is such a blessing and yet still it comes with caution and so many fears. It seems like this is a good opportunity to kind to dig into those fears a bit and ask God to help me process and deal with past losses and see this pregnancy as something totally different and good. In fact, I think He is the only one who can take away my fears.
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